I had a melt down moment. I'm not proud of it. Someone who means nothing to me made me feel worthless. Why did I let him do it?
We were out to dinner and I was feeling absolutely fantastic about myself. A friend of a friend who I had only met for the first time made a joke that he "DISLIKED" the compatability score between he and I. (Stupid game we used to play as kids where you put your name Loves insert name here. Then you cross out how many L's, O's, V's, E's S's etc. Which gives you a percentage. (some of you may be too young to know what I am talking about lol). Well my name was included with his and he made a big song and dance that he disliked it. It really pissed me off at first. Who the fuck are you! As if I have any interest in you anyway.
But then in the car home I really got upset. Now thinking about it, I think the past week was just brought to a head thanks to that. I had had a hell of a week with sleeping and my kids being sick. One child had been diagnosed with suspected Whooping Cough. So you can imagine how much stress I had been under. Then the doctors picked up an irregular heartbeat in her. Well it was the week from hell. I was so extremely tired and emotional that I cried for hours. I actually didn't get any sleep at all.
It really made me angry that I let a stupid little game upset me so much. But I really hope it got to me so much because I was so emotionally on edge anyway.
Or is it because I feel I want everyone to like me? I've always thought I don't give a shit what people especially those I will never see again, think of me. This is why I think it was just the emotions catching up with me.
Hahah had a blonde moment also this week (again I blame tiredness & my bad hair colour lol). I for some reason thought I had to be 81.9kg to have lost 40kg. I was 82.3kg on Thursday and thought I was soooo close. Friday morning I weigh myself, I am 80.9kg. OMG! I did it I scream. I've lost 40kg! Just to make sure I get the calculator out. What the hell was I thinking!? Should have stayed at school that extra year longer I think lol. I have no idea how I came up with the result that I would be 40kg lighter if I got to 81.9kg. I just don't know lol! turns out, I have 1.8kg to go. Thanks to the trusty calculator. So its close!
Finally now that everyone in the house is well again (touch wood) and school goes back this week, I may be able to get some exercise in again. I haven't been to the gym for a month! I am surprisingly missing it too. Will edge back in slowly.
I have to share something I find very inspirational with you. My friend Stephanie was on Today Tonight on friday night. Stephanie has suffered terribly with insults from ignorant people because of her size. I have been fortunate enough to not suffer anywhere near as many taunts as she has.
She told her story to Today Tonight and I am so proud of her for standing up and being counted. I don't know what gives people the right to think they can degrade people they way they do. When it all comes down to it, fat, thin, black, white, tall, short, we are all human. We should respect each other no matter what.
Steph has set herself a challenge to walk 46 flights of stairs at the building she works at. I would love it if you could please sponsor her and help her raise money for the Cancer Council.
Check out Steph's blog: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.movingforwardlookingforward.blogspot.com%2F&h=kAQDl-_p2
Cancer Council Link: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fvic.cancercouncilfundraising.org.au%2FpersonalPage.aspx%3FregistrationID%3D342014%26langPref%3Den-CA&h=UAQDnk6Ts
Today Tonight Link: http://au.todaytonight.yahoo.com/article/9811238/none/obesity-humiliation
You will not believe the comments she has received from some people on her blog. You will be gobsmacked!
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