Time to Squeeze the most out of this journey!

I haven't blogged for a while.  Like I have said before, life has just returned to normal, except I am thinner. lol
My weight has hit a plateau.  Although I haven't been completely good with my diet.  Just eating what is going, what everyone else is eating etc.  Of course the size of the meal is still very small. 

I am really wanting to try to lose the last 10 - 15kg.  So I will hopefully be seeing my dietician in the next week or so.  Just need to find some spare cash and make some appointments.
I do worry that seeing as its been so hard to lose, that it will be very hard to keep off.
I am extremely happy with where I am don't get me wrong.  To be honest, I think I miss the adrenalin of the excitement and praise I receive when reaching goals.
I really hate my gym so haven't been there, stupidly just paying my membership fee's until the contract is over.  I just don't feel comfortable there AT ALL.
Went out dancing on the weekend.  I was aching all over the next day.  If I could just dance like that every day I would probably shed the kilos'!  Less the alcohol I am sure lol.

Just a few new photos.  Nothing's changed, just my hair is getting longer lol.

 

Yes my new favourite day is "Selfie Saturday"

Compliments and HIdden Agenda's

I haven't blogged for a while, again, nothing new has happened in the weight loss area.  I gained about 4kg.  I cut out my Zarraffa's Fusions (ok cut down) hehehe and have been watching what I eat for the most part.  And thank fully I lost 2kg of that 4.
I am here to get down in writing my crazy thoughts.  I am struggling to accept compliments for what they are.... compliements.

So I have said this before, I remember when I was younger I would always get told I had beautiful eyes.  For years I never heard anything like that said.  Until I met my husband.  According to him every part of me is beautiful.  No matter how I look.  So to cut to now, I am getting compliments and flirted with and hit on and I am not taking it well.

A few weeks ago we had my Sister In Law's hens night.  It was a fantastic night, so much fun, lots of laughs, dancing and girly chats.  After dinner and a show at Dracula's we hit Jupiter's Casino.  They have a few bars there with music and of course the gambling.

We tried out a couple of the bars and danced the night away. 

I received alot of male attention.  So much so my Sister in Law asked me if I was omitting pharamones.  I don't want this to sound conceited.  But it did actually happen.  This has never happened before.  I have always been the fat friend while I stood there and watched my gorgeous friends get hit on and chatted up.  This time it was me!  Yes I am married so nothing was ever going to happen.  It didn't stop them!  I even had one guy tell me if we both weren't married he would kiss me right there and then.  My sister in law was sitting right there next to me.  Gee I must have looked nice.

BUT , here is my problem.  I felt there were hidden agenda's involved.  To me, they were playing games and having a laugh at me.  In my head I had thoughts that they were either trying to win a bet as to who could hit on the fat chick or making me the butt of their joke etc.  I was even scared they were going to put drugs in my drinks.  Don't laugh.  I did.  I mean why else do these people want to talk to me. 

Last night at a family wedding, one of my husbands cousin's sons asked me for a dance later in the night.  I even had those negative thoughts with him.  To me I thought he was having a laugh with his mates also.  He was doing it as part of a dare etc.  I even spoke to his mum who was with us on the Hen's night and explained to her how I was feeling.  I told her even though I knew her and her husband have raised their boys right and they would never allow him to do something like that, but I still had those negative thoughts.  She went on to tell me that he was asking me to dance because he genuinely thought I was looking great and was proud of me.  We talked about the hens night and my feelings that night also.  She told me I was looking very confident that night and like I was happy which is what would have attracted those guys.  She went on to tell me how beautiful I am and that my looks have changed but my personality hasn't.  I have always been a beautiful person.  I know he wasn't trying to pick me up or anything.  He is family and half my age lol.  But even though he is family I still had that little voice in my head telling me he was making me the butt of a joke.

To me I still see that old 120kg person.  I still have this belly and I still feel fat.  So this is why I don't believe people when they compliment me.  How long does it take for you to get your mind around these things?  Why do I still see that 120kg person in the mirrow?





Letting the Endophins out

Finally pushed myself to get back to the gym today.  OMG why did I leave it so long?  Well I know why, I have been busy, but also, petrified.
I hate feeling like the new kid at school.  I hate not knowing how things work and trying to fit in.
But I did it, I tried to make excuses this morning but I pushed myself to make the phone call and book the kids into the creche and I went! 
I actually really enjoyed it.  I didn't go too hard as I am still finding my feet but I used a few of the machines, just until I get my bearings.  I felt great while working out with my music pumping.  Can't wait to feel like I belong there.

Did I show you the Gala Dinner photos yet?  OMG I can't believe its me in the photos.  I keep looking at them because I just don't recognise the person in them.  Well I recognie the hunk a spunk on my arm, but not the chick in the blue dress.

 

 

I felt like a million dollars.  I had my hair done thanks to Diet Chat and it was so beautiful!
It was a fabulous night and everyone there looked amazing.

Diet Chat

I am proud to say that I have been asked to provide a Testimonial for http://www.dietchat.com.au/. 
This is the dietcian that helped me get to where I am today.
I met Fiona in 2010 and from the word go I have felt at ease and felt like losing weight was truly possible.
Fiona has been an amazing supporter of mine over the last 2 years.  I have always felt completely comfortable with Fiona and known I was on the right track. 
I am so honoured to be asked to provide my own feedback on the forum.  There is a seperate Topic for Weight Loss Surgery.
I am happy to answer any questions there and would love to help at least 1 person on their journey.
To be asked to do something like this makes me realise, I must have done something right. 

You can also find Diet Chat on Facebook.  They are always updating fantastic tips and advise.  www.facebook.com/dietchat.  Join their page and tell them Tracey sent you.  I have already had friend's receive valuable knowledge from them. 


As far as the weight loss for me goes, I am still here between 72-74kg.  No movement for around 10 months.  I am completely happy though, I am not too worried about it.  As much as I would like to lose at least another 5kg, I am comfortable.  I do have my 20 year school reunion in October so am looking at shifting the last 5kg by then.  Not sure how much different it will make me look lol.

I have the Make A Wish Tropical Nights Gala dinner in just over 2 weeks.  This is me at the last 2 Gala Dinners.

You have probably all seen these photos a thousand times before.  This year I am wearing a beautiful cocktail gown so I am excited about comparing photos again.

I hope you all head over to Diet Chat and have a look.  I can't thank them and my surgeon Dr Gregory Nolan enough for giving me a life. 

I did it! I finished! And I kicked ARSE!

READY TO RACE

I did it!  And in around 50 minutes!  I ran the hardest I had ever run before.  I am not just saying it either.  Because I know I did.  I pushed myself the whole way, talked to myself, told myself I could do it.  I picked landmarks to keep running to before I stopped.

I am not going to lie, it hurt.  I ended up with a stitch about 1km into the race.  That last for 3km's. I also had numb toes in my left foot.  My new shoes do this to me for some reason. 

It was so amazing to be there among the thousands of people.  I think there were around 4000 entrants.  I came about half way! 

There were people on the side of the road cheering everyone on and clapping, it was so inspiring to see them.  At one point my Brother in Law was there to watch my Sister In Law with their 3 kids, it was nice to see them.  My niece Madi grabbed my hand at one point and ran along with me.  That really touched me.

DURING THE RACE

Photo thanks to my Brother In Law Al and Sister in Law Jacqui

I ran with my Sister In Law Jacqui, her friend Christine and Jacqui's trainer Will.  It was nice to be a part of Team Awesome.  I raised almost $700 for Make A Wish Australia.

The last 500 metres was probably the hardest.  Everything was aching.  But I was determined to get over that line.  I actually burst into tears coming over the line.  The relief it was over, the realisation of how far I had come, and also because I was alone.  I didn't have anyone there for me cheering me on.  It really broke my heart.  I don't know if my family got the enormity of what I was doing.

FINISHED!

I feel absolutely amazing that I did it, I actually feel it was all a dream.  I felt a little lost in the afternoon afterwards.  But boy was I reminded the next day that I did it!  hahaha I couldn't move a muscle without screaming, even my butt cheeks hurt!  Today I am feeling alot better, the tops of my legs are still a little sore but I can walk without screaming.

Guess what, I am actually considering doing the Bridge to Brisbane in September.  HOLY COW!  Who is this person I have become.  Of course it will just be for fun and to say I have done it.  I won't be trying to break any records or anything.

I also have organised a fundraiser "Sun, Surf & Wishes Walk" on July 21st at Burleigh.  I am very excited about this.  It is an easy 5km walk along the Burleigh Beachfront. 

https://www.facebook.com/events/134192456715455/

Check out the event if you would like to take part!

12 more sleeps! ARGHHHHHH!

12 more sleeps until I run my very first marathon. God knows how I am going to go.  Somehow I am meant to be getting some training in.  I can't even find time to go to the toilet at the moment.  First one of my kids were sick, then I did something to my back and could hardly walk.  Now the kids are sick again and I am coming down with it. 
I had 2 nights off from the kids on the weekend, you know what I did?  I slept!  I slept til 10am both mornings.  My god I needed it.  But again back to the no sleep.  Dealing with sick kids and having stuff play on your mind is not a good recipe for trying to sleep.
Why is it mother's are the only ones that hear the kids during the night. I reckon I could hold a rave in my lounge room at night and my husband wouldn't hear it.  Between the both of us, even with him working, I swear he gets the most sleep.  He goes out like a light!  Drives me insane!  Sometimes I just want to smother him with a pillow it makes me so angry! lol.  There you go, a confession of a sleep deprived mother! lol
So back to the topic.
I am still very excited about the Marathon, I have been asking those in the know lots of questions.  I am ready to put together my ipod playlist.  I have asked for some motivating song suggestions.  Do you have any? 
I am just over half way to my goal of raising $500 for Make A Wish Australia.  If you would like to sponsor me, please follow the link below.


http://www.everydayhero.com.au/tracey_drescher_7

But if you can't sponsor me, please wish me luck!  You can leave your messages of support here!

Lose 50kg, do a Marathon. Why Not?

So, 18 months ago, I wouldn't have run for a bus if I was running late.  The only run I knew about was the one in my stockings.
Guess what!?  I have sigend up to do the Gold Coast Marathon in June.
I am doing the 5.7km Run/Walk.  I am very excited.  I have a few people who have been doing Marathons and have inspired me to give it a go.  I am not after a PB or anything but I want to cross it off my bucket list.
I am running for Make-A-Wish Australia.  I want to raise at least $500 for them.  You can sponsor me at http://www.everydayhero.com.au/tracey_drescher_7.
I have started training.  Not so much the running part, but just keeping my fitness levels up.  I have been running on the treadmill.  I did 4km in 40minutes on a treadmill the other day.  So hopefully if I can keep a good pace I should finish the Marathon in an hour.
Its my birthday tomorrow.  Looking forward to a great night out and dinner tonight with friends.
I have asked for a Gold Coast Titans Jersey for my birthday.  I have always wanted a footy jersey but was always way too big to fit one.  Now I am down to a smaller size I have used it as my dream outfit.
I can't wait to see if I get one!

I saw my Dietician and Surgeon last week.  I am apparantly exactly where I am supposed to be with my weight loss.  I am doing everything right.  My Surgeon said I was a "Poster child" for this surgery.  Now that is a huge compliment!

My Dietician has also asked me to do a Testimonial for her website with before and after photos.  WOW!  What an honour!  I must be doing something right.

All in all, I am feeling fantastic.  Still can't believe it's me sometimes when I look in the mirror or see a photo of myself.

My gorgeous family <3

Plateau of all Plateau's!

Seriously, no change for over 6 months.  I am going out of my mind.  I know I should be happy and stop looking at the scales, but even my cloths have stayed the same!
I can't wait to see my Dietician in a few weeks,  To see what I can do from here, what my goal weight should be.
Don't get me wrong, I feel fantastic.  Still find it hard to recognise myself in photos.  Loving life, but I just want to lose another 3-5kg then I will be happy!  That will get me in the 60's!

KIMAX

Wow! I am loving KIMAX. If you don't know what it is, it combines boxing, Mai thai (sp), and kickboxing.
I love being able to smash the crap out of something.
Today I walked out of the gym shaking! I worked my arse off!
I am used to having at least one other person on the bag with me. So that means, you do the move, step back, they do the move, then your back in. So you "kind of" get a little break between moves.
Today I had a bag to myself. Well I sheared it with the instructor. So she would show the move twice then it was me. So that meant I was doing each move continually. Full on, punch, kick, elbow over and over!
I bloody loved it but far out I was exhausted! All I kept thinking was, gee I bloody better get some results this week!

Sharing my love

Again I have to ask, who is this person, what have you done with Tracey!
I am so addicted to the gym its actually quite funny.  If I don't get to go when I want to I get a bit antsy!
I took my friend Gen this week, I felt proud to show her my Gym and what I love.  We did a class together.  We are both hurting bad today.  I can't sneeze without feeling like I am dying.  My ab muscles are so sore.  The gym instructors tell me that is a good sign.  They are so funny!
I felt proud to share the gym with Gen and show her something I am so proud of. 
The gym currently has a 5 week challenge running.  30 classes in 5 weeks.  That means I would have to do 6 classes a week to be in with a chance!  I would love to give it a red hot go.  I am just hampered by having the kids.  lol I know that sounds bad.  But, I can only do the classes during the week, in the morning as that is when the creche is open.  I have tried a couple times to go to some night classes but that has just involved more drama's than an episode of Home & Away!  So I will just do what I can.  I am already going more often than I normally would before they started the challenge, so it is a good challenge for them to run.

I have joined a group that has people who have had or are going to have the sleeve.  It is so refreshing to see those that have just started their journey and to see them have the same fears and questions as I did.  I do hope I can be an inspiration to them and answer their questions and fears.
I am so proud of what I have achieved, I am blown away by the results.

One of the subjects in this group has stood out for me.  Some of those just about to be sleeved and worried about events coming up where they won't be able to eat.  For example going on a cruise or a birthday party etc.  If you remember reading back, I had the same worries.  But now that I am here, food is just a energy tool now.  I haven't missed one single thing.  There is nothing I can't eat, it is just the amount of it that has changed.  I mean I wouldn't bother going to Sizzler's as it would be a waste of money really, but to be honest, I am eating quality rather than quantity now.  I would rather eat a beautiful cut of meat or a yummy piece of fish than some dodgy salad or packet soup.  Ok I lie, I would love a bit of cheese toast! (anyone going there soon can you send me a slice hahaha).  But like I say, I could go if I wanted to, I wouldn't eat much so its just not financially worth it for me.  I went to a buffet dinner last weekend (part of a night out), I still got to eat what was offered.  I just made the right choices as to what I know I would get the most benefit from .

I have been snacking after dinner the last few weeks.  I don't know why I am, I am not even hungry!  I am just having cravings.  Last night I had a cheese & biscuits, a snack packet of chips and a packet of fruit nuggets).  I am trying so hard not to.  I am in future going to go to bed as soon as I get the cravings.  (Well tonight I decided to blog).

I have had an amazing responce to my before and after photo (taken last time I blogged).  The photos have been shared by some of my friends and even by another branch of my gym!  I am so proud.  The comments have been so supportive. 

“Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn't have the time to sit around and talk about you. What's important to me is not others' opinions of me, but what's important to me is my opinion of myself.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Do I even need words?

7/10/2010

23/2/2012

Got a goal to aim for

Ive had a think and worked out a goal weight I would like to reach. I think my "BMI weight" is supposed to be 55-60kg. There is no way in hell I could be that weight. There would be nothing of me. That weight is just not in my nature.
So I've decided, I'd love to get to 69kg. That's only 3-4kg away (depending on the time of day/month).
I've found I've been stuck at 72kg for a few months now. It's driving me insane. I've obviously hit a plateau but fees it's frustrating.
So if I could get to 69kg that would make my total weight loss be at 50kg.
Even thinking of being 69kg makes me think that's too small. But I know I can achieve that.
I don't have a time frame. It's just a goal to reach whenever I reach it.
I've gotten back into the gym. Two days in a row. I tried KIMAX class yesterday at the gym. I freakin loved it. Infact I couldn't stop thinking about it all night. I can't wait to do the class again.
I'm sore today from it, but went to the gum again and did RPM. I'm totally spent right now. I'm laying on the lounge and I just can't move. I think if I closed my eyes I would sleep for a week.
I was actually very surprised at my stamina through the KIMAX class. I feel I have some kind of fight in me.
I've been really trying to watch what I eat. But I completely crashed and burned after dinner. I'd been so perfectly good all day. But I just caved. I ate 2 packets (mini packs) of twisties and 4 squares of chocolate! I'm such a pig!
I ate good snacks all through the day, fruit, yoghurt, I had my protein lunch etc. I wasn't even hungry. I just had an urge! What is wrong with me!?

Back on the Horse

Argh, the last few months I have really been slack.  My eating, my exercise, has been horrid.
Well I should'nt really say that.  When I look at my food diary, my eating hasn't been THAT bad. But my exercise has sucked.  I just haven't had the time.  With school holiday's I spent so much time keeping the kids entertained that I just never had time for me.
So today I got back into it.  Straight back to the gym and threw myself in the deep end.  Did and RPM class.  Your supposed to burn 600 - 800 Calories per class.  I actually felt pretty good, it didn't hurt as much as I thought it would.  It still hurt but I hadn't lost much of my momentum during my break.  My bum will be sore tomorrow I am sure.  I was worried about feeling ill afterwards but I actually felt ok.

I started the day with a Protein shake this morning, OMG.  My stomach does not tolerate it at all.  I have been paying for it all day.  I have been too scared to leave the house.  It just seems to go straight through me.  But I need the protein so I have to keep it up.  Hopefully my tummy will get used to it.

I have been asked if I had thought I took the "easy way out" with having Surgery.  Well if you can say having major stomach surgery the easy way out, having 2/3rds of your stomach removed the easy way out, then yes.  I don't see it that way.  I have worked bloody hard also.  Even if it is the easy way out, I did something about it.  I could still be sitting on my arse, eating myself into an early grave.  I could be out there starving myself and slogging it out at the gym where it would only lead me to temptation again.  I did something about it.  No matter which way I did it, the proof is in my pictures.  I did what was best for me.

To be honest, I don't care if people think I did take the easy way out, I feel awesome.  Plus like I said, I tried the "conventional" way over and over and I failed.  How long could I go on fighting that losing battle?

Started watching The Biggest Loser that started on tv again last night.  God it makes me sick the way they show the contestants and their eating.  I never ate that way and I don't know any overweight person who does.  We aren't all pigs stuffing our faces into troughs! 

Also what shits me, this season is focusing on the contestants being too big to find love.  Making out no one big can  find anyone to love them.  Its complete bullshit.  I found love with one of the most amazing men and I was huge.  I was even bigger throughout out relationship, now he gets me at my best.  But to say overweight people can't find love its a croc of shit.  That just means people are taking your looks over your personality, and if that's the case, then those people aren't worth having a relationship with anyway!

Happy New Year! Can you believe it's 2012!

NEW YEARS 2011 

 NEW YEARS 2012

NEW YEARS 2012

I wanted to start with photos as the saying, a picture speaks a thousand words is so true.  I mean look at me!  I'm a completely different person!

What an amazing year 2011 was.  I honestly didn't want it to end.  I had the best year of my life.  Not only with my weight but life in General.  A fabulous family, great friends, so much support from everyone.  I also had a great year winning prizes.  I love to enter competitions, its my hobby.  I did very well in 2011.  I won almost $7000 in prizes!  I really hope it continues in 2012.

Gosh, what a year it was.  I learnt so much about myself, so much about my confidence, my true value.  I learnt so much about relationships.  I learnt people can be very jealous.  Yes of me!  I have learnt some people can never be happy for you no matter what is going on.

Back to my weight loss. 

I have noticed I can eat a little more lately.  I notice my meals are getting bigger.  Not as big as they used to be of course but now where maybe I could eat half a sandwich, I can now finish the whole sandwich.  This scares me a little.  I don't want to ever get back to where I was so I have been really watching the decisions I make with my eating.  Yes I can only eat small meals but I need to make sure those meals are valuable.  I need to make sure i get the most out of each of those meals.

Starting New Years day, I decided to cut out the 1 can of coke a day habit.  LOL.  Hey this is good compared to what it was, I used to drink Litres a day!  But even the one can can't be good for me so I have made the conscious decision to lay off.  Today 7 days in, I caved, I had about 100ml of coke, shared a can with my husband.  Mind you, I saved it til after my dinner so couldn't even finish that 100ml.  SO not entirely sinful lol.

I bought a new top the other day.  I found one I liked but it only had a size 14 or a size 10.  As I have been in 14 for a while, I knew I had to go smaller.  As there was no 12 I just thought I would try the 10.  HOLY FREAKIN BAT SHIT!  it fit!  I just can't believe it.  Size 10.  Me, formallly size 26 now in a size 10!  Wow!  Friends of mine who I look at as skinny minnies are telling me that is smaller than what they wear.  That can't be right, I am not smaller than them!

My mum posted a photo of me yesterday in my swimmers.  I said it wasn't me, it looks nothing like me (the image I remember as a size 26). 

THIS CAN NOT BE ME!

Anyway, welcome to the New Year!  I hope 2012 has the best install for you all.  Thank you for your support in 2011.  It has been absolutely amazing for me.



I am still around!

Its been a while since I have blogged.  Seeing I am child free today I thought that was the perfect oppourtunity to try to update without being interrupted!
I haven't really blogged because like I said before, how many times can you come in and say how awesome life is?
I feel fantastic, I am being told I look fantastic.  People I haven't seen for a while aren't recognising me.  I always read and heard stories of people saying friends they hadn't seen in a while walk straight past them in the street.  I never believed it could be possible.  I mean, after all, your still you right.  Well it seems not..  I am gettinga  good laugh at some things that happen.  People I haven't seen for a while not recognising me at all.  Asking others "Who's that girl?" hahaha
I am down to 72.2kg now. Think that makes it about 47kg I have lost.  The weight loss has really slowed down now though.  I haven't lost anything for a while.  But I feel fantastic, I am not worried at all.  If anymore comes off them so be it.

I have noticed I can eat a little more now.  No where near the amount I used to eat, but I can finish a sandwich now or a little more of my dinner etc.  This means I have to now keep a better eye on what I eat.  I don't want to end up back where I was.  Not that I could, but even putting on any weight would freak me out!

I caught up with an old work collegue last week.  She hadn't seen me for a very long time.  She asked others there who I was, when they told her and told her how much weight I had lost she replied "wow, you must have been huge" lol  Yep, I was.  BUT I still look at photos of me back then and can't believe it was me.  I just didn't feel that big.

My god daughter (god love her) saw a photo of my on my identification badge for work and said "you look like you are in a fat booth" PMSL.

My Surgeon told me "You look so good your making me hungry"  not sure exactly what it meant but I am sure it was a compliment. lol.  My dietician was very happy with me also.  I am doing everything right.

I am all ready for Christmas, I can't wait.  I remember Christmas Day last year I had lost exactly 20kg.  I thought I looked awesome then!  Wow I can't believe how far I have come!

CHRISTMAS 2010 99kg (20kg loss)

CHRISTMAS 2011 72kg



I touched earlier on the year on some exciting news I got.  It will now be happening sometime in the near year.  I am so very excited.  My story is being printed in my favourite magazine.  I can't wait to share my story with others and hopefully inspire someone else to make the decision to win the battle against the bulge.  I will definately let you k now when it happens.

Again I want to just say a huge thank you to everyone who has supported me.  Sending me messages, commenting on my photos and blogs.  It means so much to me.  Thank you so much.

How Should I Celebrate?

Its coming up to 12 months since my surgery. Should I celebrate?  How could I celebrate lol.  I can't believe its been 12 months and I can't believe I am at where I am!  Back when I was looking into the surgery I read other peoples success and saw they lost this much weight in 12 months.  I thought that was amazing and would be great but never thought I would achieve it.I mean, gee I had tried for YEARS to lose weight.  There was no way I would have that success.
Well the proof is in the pudding.  I have and its incredible.
I can't believe how good I feel.  I keep catching glances of myself in a window or mirror and think, who is that person, that isn't me.  I look NORMAL!
I am loving being able to buy clothes in little specialty stores.  I am loving the cute little tops I can buy.  I am in a size 14 top now and 16 bottoms.  It feels crazy to me to be wearing those sizes.  I pick it up in the shop and think no way that will fit me!  And it does!
I have hit a plateau again.  But I really don't care.  I feel so good now.

My youngest turns 2 on wednesday, if you read my posts from this time last year, I was in the middle of my Optifast plan and was hanging for a piece of meat lol.
I got to taste that meat at the party, check out my photo

I just don't remember being that big.  Its crazy.

Anyway, its sunday morning and hubby is cooking a yummy breakfast.  So I am off to enjoy that then get ready for what the day will bring.

OMG I did it! 12 months today!

12 months ago today I started the Optifast diet.  This was a plan I had to do before surgery.  Before surgery you need to shrink your liver so the surgeon can do the surgery safely.  He needs to get behind the liver to operate on the stomach.
My goal weight was to get to 75kg by the Make A Wish Gala Dinner.  Sadly I didn't reach that but I hadn't been too bothered.  I feel fantastic so anything more is just a huge bonus.
Well today 12 months since I started I thought I  better weigh myself.
There was a bit of excitement at home this morning I almost forgot.  We have a huge storm going over and I was running around trying to make sure all windows were shut, kids were ok, things were unplugged etc.
Then I remembered what day it was.
So I jumped on the scales and squealed with delight.  I just can't believe it.
I have been talking to friends who, to me, are skinny minny's.  Absolutely gorgeous,  They tell me I weigh less than them.  I can't believe it!  No way do I have a body like theirs.  I feel a bit like the contestants on "How to look good naked".  You know where they line up a heap of women and the contestant goes and selects where her body fits in.  I would be so wrong if it was me.  Why is it I still see 120kg when I look in the mirror?
I have been looking at photos of me back at 120kg and I don't recognise myself.  Noone believes me that its me.  In a way it makes me kind of sad, its hard to explain.  But it makes me feel like that person no longer exists.  But I really liked that person.  She was a beautiful person.  She had 3  beautiful daughters, was a great mum, a great wife, a great friend.  Where is she now? 
This has been the most amazing 12 months of my life.  I can't believe the amount of weight I have lost.
I often think whether I could have done it without surgery by just eating the small amounts I eat now.  There is no way in hell!  If I would have been going on just 100grams of food each meal without surgery , I would have either killed myself or a mass murder.  And I know its to do with the Gland that releases the hormone Grenlin that controls your hugner levels etc.  Without that, I never feel hungry.

I can't thank everyone enough for their support, their words of encouragement, their compliments, even the looks of shock when people who at first don't recognise me then realise who I am.  That is actually quite funny. lol

This is just to amazing for words!

I'm an Inspiration

I can't believe it.  I never thought, me, Tracey, would ever be called or feel like an inspiration. 
I have had lots of people telling me lately but today it hit me and I believe it.
Since I have been losing weight I have had lots of people ask me about my surgery etc.  Nothing is off limits with me, I am happy to talk about everything infact, you won't get me stopped after I start!
I have had people who have had lap band surgery tell me they wish they had of had what I had done.  Some of them have had their friends speak to me about Gastric Sleeve Surgery rather than lap band. 
The last few weeks I have had a number of people really question me abou the surgery.  They have now booked in themselves!  I can't believe it, I can't believe that I am something people would want to aspire to be like.  Have the success I have had.  I feels amazing and I am just feeling so proud of myself.

I wish all of those people all of the best with their surgeries.  I have told them follow your surgeons and dieticians orders to the letter.  That is the only way things will work. 

I went to my first dress up party on the weekend.  WOW!  It felt so good to be able to get involved rather than throw a Sombrero on my head!  I felt amazing (a little over exposed with the amount of flesh I had showing lol).  I also can't believe the photos that it is me.  I am super impressed with my jaw line!  I have a chin!  Yes a chin, one single chin!!!  God I wish I had of done this years ago!

Check out the Jaw line!  No, not the chest, the jaw line! lol



I feel amazing, I can't believe my own transformation.  Not just my size but my outlook on life, my outlook on myself, my confidence and the belief in myself.  Finallly I feel worthy of my own love.



I was knocked out for a week!

I had my very first session with a Personal Trainer on Monday.  (For those of you following, today is now Friday, yes its taken me that long to be able to post!).
It knocked me out for a week.
It really hurt during the session.  But I just thought well that is what it is supposed to do!  I pushed myself as much as the PT pushed me.  I didn't want to look like a sissy!  My PT is my RPM trainer so she know's what kind of stamina I have (Its all just for show really!),  So she knew how far to push me.
And boy did she push me!  I was screaming and moaning like a girl towards the end.  At one stage I rested my legs for a split second.  My PT said "Do that again and we will start the set again"  OMG!  I had tears s treaming down my face, I was grunting and groaning.  And that was just taking a sip of water!
At one point my PT told me she has had people throw dumbells at her before during a session because they didn't like how hard she was pushing them.  I told her I didn't know how they would have the energy to do it.  I didn't even have the energy to flip her the bird!
So session over, it took me 20 minutes just to get off the floor. My PT had moved on to torture some other poor soul.  I had to get my 2 youngest girls out of the creche.  Somehow I then also had to drive them home.  I was on the verge of vomiting and I felt very dizzy.  I know I couldn't have vomited if I wanted to,  My stomach muscles had gone on strike anyway.  Either that or they had imploded!
So I drove home very weak and feeling very ill.  Got home got the girls sorted with morning tea and then put one of them to bed.
I then spent the rest of the day on the lounge.  I tried to drink a protein shake I had made up but I just couldn't stomach it!  As the day went on everything started to hurt, even my eyelashes.  I was still feeling weak.  Everyone kept telling me to have some sugar.  I went to get a lolly out of the lollly jar, but its on the top shelf of the cupboard to stop the kids getting into them.  I couldn't bloody reach them!  I couldn't lift my arms!  The rest of the day was a wipe out.  All I wanted to do was sleep .
Tuesday morning, HOLY MOTHER MARY & JOSEPH!  I couldn't move!  I screamed trying to get out of bed!  I had to get the youngest out of her cot, of all days, she chose today to jump out!  I screamed as I knew it was going to hurt trying to catch her and always at the thought that I was in too much pain to catch her.
I spent the rest of the day in absollute agony, I text my PT and asked her to come and brush my teeth as I couldn't even do that. She said "Welcome to the world of PT" lol. 
I had to take my oldest to school, that was intersting, trying to get in and out of the car,  I also threw in a quick trip to the shops.  BIG MISTAKE! BIG! HUGE!  The youngest decided to take off in the carpark.  Imagine if you will, me, muscles as sore as anything, trying to run, I looked like an ungraceful galloping horse.  I was screaming, she was laughing!  (note to self:  Kill her when I get my strength back and my teeth stop hurting).  My PT text's again to see how I am feeling.  I tell her I still hate her.  She says "I can live with that".  Yeah, you'll keep!
Thank god it was takeaway Tuesday! 
Wednesday morning, so much more relief!  Still sore but at least I can move without crying.  Everyone still laughing at me.  I get some grocery shopping done and some running around, but I'm back home again to take it easy.
I couldn't bring myself to go to the gym again yet.  I don't know if I can see my PT without bursting into tears or having my muscles run off in the other direction!

We went to the Gold Coast Bulletin Famous Party and Sea FM's no secrets Party last week.  Wow, what a fantastic weekend.  Hubby and I just had so much fun, so many drinks and not enough sleep!
We both scrubbed up alright too if I do say so myself!  It was so nice to be able to dress up glamorous.  I haven't done it in a very long time.  Infact I haven't done it with a body like this before!



We met lots of celebrities.  My favourite being Scott Prince , William Zillman and Kevin Gordon from the Gold Coast Titans.  But the best part of the night was the Photobooth.  What a brilliant idea.  I even took Scotty Prince in there with me! lol



Bring on the Sea Fm No Secrets party.  Another top night, lots of drinks, lots of fun.  And again, lots of glamour!

ME AND CHARLI ROBINSON (Formerly of HI 5)

Well best be off.  Seeing I have been out for the count all week, my house looks like a tip.  I also have to pack for another weekend away.  We are getting out trashy on this weekend.  Heading to a friends 80's themed 40th birthday party.  So excited. 

Oh, before I go, there is also something you should know (wow I am a poet and didn't know it!)  Scroll down for a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!

KEEP SCROLLING

LITTLE BIT MORE

ALMOST THERE

40 KILOGRAMS GONE!!!

Thats right, I have lost 40kg thanks to this amazing surgery.

I now weigh 79kg.

Anything now is just a huge bonus.

Not much to report because I just feel awesome!

I haven't really updated much, nothing else to tell really except how good I feel!  If I came and posted here every day how awesome I feel then you would all get sick of it. (If you aren't already lol).

Met with some family over the weekend who haven't seen me in a while.  All they could do was stare at me and say "OMG Trace!"  They were very impressed.  Some didn't even recognise me lol.

I noticed I haven't had a drink for a while (alcoholic), I do like to have a drink here and there (no not get raving drunk but a drunk to wind down lol) I jsut haven't had one as if I drink I can't eat!  I know I gain more from the food so I save the room for that.

Still having cravings of course, really into Le Snack cheese & biscuits at the moment.  I know its the cheese I want but gotta have a cracker for it to go on.  Of course, can't completely give up the chocolate.  Also I am really into fish & chips. 
I always get comments from people "you shouldn't be eating that".  Well no, noone should.  But the fact is, I can, its the amount I eat that makes the difference.  Before for example, I would have fish, chips, calamari rings, seafood stick, prawn cutlets and maybe a potato scallop or 2 if I was still hungry!  Now I can have a couple of Calamari rings and some chips or a small piece of fish and some chips. 
Same as if I do some baking, people say " you shouldn't be eating that" well , I do have 4 other people in my house that I cook for also, its not all just for me.

I am on the hunt for a few outfits, going to a Glamorous party on Thursday night, so need to find a nice cocktail dress, then I am going to an 80's party next week so need to find something trashy!  Hehehe I am so excited.  NOrmally if I was invited to go to a Fancy Dress party I would throw a sombrero on my head,  Cause that is the only thing that would fit.  I am excited to be able to be one of the crowd now.