Back on the Horse

Argh, the last few months I have really been slack.  My eating, my exercise, has been horrid.
Well I should'nt really say that.  When I look at my food diary, my eating hasn't been THAT bad. But my exercise has sucked.  I just haven't had the time.  With school holiday's I spent so much time keeping the kids entertained that I just never had time for me.
So today I got back into it.  Straight back to the gym and threw myself in the deep end.  Did and RPM class.  Your supposed to burn 600 - 800 Calories per class.  I actually felt pretty good, it didn't hurt as much as I thought it would.  It still hurt but I hadn't lost much of my momentum during my break.  My bum will be sore tomorrow I am sure.  I was worried about feeling ill afterwards but I actually felt ok.

I started the day with a Protein shake this morning, OMG.  My stomach does not tolerate it at all.  I have been paying for it all day.  I have been too scared to leave the house.  It just seems to go straight through me.  But I need the protein so I have to keep it up.  Hopefully my tummy will get used to it.

I have been asked if I had thought I took the "easy way out" with having Surgery.  Well if you can say having major stomach surgery the easy way out, having 2/3rds of your stomach removed the easy way out, then yes.  I don't see it that way.  I have worked bloody hard also.  Even if it is the easy way out, I did something about it.  I could still be sitting on my arse, eating myself into an early grave.  I could be out there starving myself and slogging it out at the gym where it would only lead me to temptation again.  I did something about it.  No matter which way I did it, the proof is in my pictures.  I did what was best for me.

To be honest, I don't care if people think I did take the easy way out, I feel awesome.  Plus like I said, I tried the "conventional" way over and over and I failed.  How long could I go on fighting that losing battle?

Started watching The Biggest Loser that started on tv again last night.  God it makes me sick the way they show the contestants and their eating.  I never ate that way and I don't know any overweight person who does.  We aren't all pigs stuffing our faces into troughs! 

Also what shits me, this season is focusing on the contestants being too big to find love.  Making out no one big can  find anyone to love them.  Its complete bullshit.  I found love with one of the most amazing men and I was huge.  I was even bigger throughout out relationship, now he gets me at my best.  But to say overweight people can't find love its a croc of shit.  That just means people are taking your looks over your personality, and if that's the case, then those people aren't worth having a relationship with anyway!